Arsenal America

Here?s a delusion Spurs fan who needs a big bite of a reality sandwich. As always, my comments IN ALL CAPS…

John Nicholson ? A very Northern mind (http://www.football365.com/)

There is only one big football story this summer. (SPURS NOT WINNING ANYTHING DOESN?T QUALIFY AS A BIG STORY ANYMORE)
Forget the Beckham soap opera. Forget Chelski down at Stalingrad Bridge. No, it’s nothing to do with Harry Kewell or Ronaldinho’s teeth. No, the only story this summer is the rapid and visible decline of Arsenal. (ABSOLUTELY. WE HAVEN?T WON ANYTHING SINCE THE 2003 FA CUP)

Unless David Dein suddenly finds a Borsch billionaire from Upper Volga to bail them out, I believe within a year Arsenal will not even be the biggest club in London, (that’ll be Chelsea), let alone the next Premiership champions. (I DIDN?T REALIZE THAT BEING THE BIGGEST CLUB WAS THE GOAL, I THOUGHT WINNING TROPHIES WAS THE GOAL. AND UNLESS THIS GUY KNOWS SOMETHING I DON?T, NO TEAM IS GUARANTEED OF BEING THE NEXT PREMIERSHIP CHAMPIONS)

But worse still than that for their fans, after years of domination, Arsenal could soon not even be the biggest club in North London. It’s that serious. (I DON?T THINK WERE THE ?BIGGEST? TEAM NOW, AGAIN THE GOAL IS TO BE THE BEST, WHICH WE ARE).

I know that you know that I have an irrational dislike of the Gunners. I’m upfront about it. It’s a dislike that I nurture like a tapeworm. Keeping it well fed on bile and anger. (NOW WHY WOULD THAT BE? IS IT BECAUSE SPURS HAVE DONE NOTHING FOR AGES?) But even a dispassionate look at the facts tell a story that even Arsenal fans must be worrying about before a ball has been kicked this season. (OF COURSE WE WORRY, WHAT FAN DOESN?T WORRY, BUT I DON?T SEE ANYONE JUMPING OFF OF BUILDINGS, OR CRYING THEIR EYES OUT AFTER LOSING A WORTHINGTON CUP FINAL ? SEE PICTURE AT RIGHT)

Arsenal play in a ground that holds only 5,000 more people than Derby County’s! A ground only 1,000 bigger in capacity than White Hart Lane. This is not set to change in the near future. This means they get 30,000 less than Man United, 25,000 less than Newcastle or Liverpool. Less even than Everton and Chelsea. That’s up to a million quid less per home game than their rivals. (AND YET WE?VE MANAGED TO WIN TWO DOUBLES SINCE ?98)

Every game they play at home, they lose more ground financially on their rivals and this is set to continue for years. (FACT, ARSENAL HAVE PLANS TO MOVE TO A NEW STADIUM, DO SPURS? YES, THERE ARE SOME PROBLEMS BUT WHAT MAJOR PROJECTS LIKE THIS DON?T HAVE PROBLEMS? CAN YOU SAY CATEGORICALLY THAT ARSENAL WON?T BE IN A NEW STADIUM IN 3-5 YEARS? NO, YOU CAN?T)

Traditionally, Wenger has (INTELLIGENTLY) bought his way to success (BY NOT OVERSPENDING). Every time they needed a player and sometimes when they didn’t, he went and bought one (USUALLY ON THE CHEAP). It worked and it won them two titles (TWO DOUBLES) but now Arsenal have less money to spend on players than Leicester City (AND LESS NEED TO). Less money than Portsmouth. Less money even than Spurs. It’s judgement day. (EVERY DAY IS JUDGEMENT DAY IN THE EPL, FOR EVERY TEAM. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME SPURS STARED JUDGEMENT DAY IN THE FACE AND DIDN?T BLINK?)

Arsenal have no depth in quality to their squad at all (YEAH, WE?VE GOT STIFFS ON THE BENCH LIKE WILTORD, GVB, EDU, PENNANT, KANU, JEFFERS, TAYLOR ? GUYS WHO WOULD START AT MANY TEAMS IN THE EPL). One top rank defender, one top striker, a magnificent central midfielder and then either one or two other top midfielders depending on your views of the consistency of Ljungberg and Pires. That is all they can boast. (YEAH, THAT?S PRETTY POOR, ONLY ABOUT HALF OUR TEAM WOULD MAKE AN ALL-EPL STARTING XI)
If any or all of them are not available it looks like they’re down to the bare bones straight away. (AS OPPOSED TO WHAT OTHER TEAM?) With two pre-seasons against Celtic and Rangers, there’s got to be a good chance that injuries will be picked up before the season has even started.

Have you ever poured beer through a pair of stockings? Well you should try it, preferably with a woman inside at the time because it is the prefect illustration of what Arsenal’s defence will be like this year. Leaking all over the place. (FACT ? ARSENAL GAVE UP 20 LESS GOALS THAN SPURS LAST YEAR. 20.)

If Henry is injured they don’t have any other class strikers (COUGH BERGKAMP COUGH). Or rather, they do in Franny Jeffers but Wenger seems to have spent Jeffers’ entire Highbury career alienating one of England’s best talents in favour of the always inconsistent Wiltord. If Jeffers moves to Birmingham to join Mathew Upson it’ll show just how desperate the situation has become.

Young talent like Pennant has apparently only come back into Wenger’s reckoning because he hasn’t any money to sign any overseas players. Talk of the club’s exciting prospects from management and club alike is just making a virtue out of necessity (NO, IT?S CALLED HAVING THE LUXURY OF A GREAT YOUTH SYSTEM). Wenger has always been happy to sell or loan out their own quality youth team players in favour of buying average overseas players (FIRST, THE PLAYERS WE?VE SOLD OR LOANED OUT HAVE PRETTY MUCH DONE NOTHING. SECOND, I?M NOT SURE I WOULD CALL LJUNGBERG, PIRES, VIEIRA, SILVA OR HENRY AVERAGE). He sold Upson just seven months ago remember.

It’s this blinkered approach that has led to Arsenal’s perilous current position. (OUR CURRENT POSITION IS FA CUP HOLDERS AND CHAMPIONS LEAGUE PARTICIPANTS).

Arsenal’s current first team squad has just seven English players out of 25. Of those only Cole and Campbell were first team regulars last year. (YEAH, SO?)

Forget what Arsenal have done in recent years and concentrate on the coming season (UMM, OK). I believe they’re really not much better than Spurs now (REALLY?). Sounds mad I know. It goes against the prevailing wisdom but look at the facts.
Spurs have signed more (YES) and better (REMAINS TO BE SEEN) players than they have this summer. They’ve strengthened. They’ve improved (MAYBE, BUT HOW MUCH?).

But look still closer and you can see Spurs are actually now a significantly stronger side than Arsenal in some departments. (SUCH AS?)
They have a much better goalkeeper in Keller and a better deputy in Sullivan (NONSENSE. GOALKEEPING IS A WASH AT BEST, AND THAT IS FLATTERING SPURS).

Their striking options are better. In Robbie Keane, Spurs have a player almost the equal of Henry in all but pace (AND SKILL, AND FINISHING AND PASSING), in Zamora a tremendous English prospect and in Postiga, a hot Portuguese international (WHO HAS PROVED NOTHING IN THE PREMIERSHIP). All much better than Kanu or Wiltord (RIDICULOUS, BOTH ARE INTERNATIONALS).

Spurs can’t match Vieira or Pires/Ljungberg (OR SILVA) in midfield but Davies would get into Arsenal’s first team before anyone else the Gunners have (WRONG, WILTORD WOULD PLAY BEFORE HIM).

Worse still for Arsenal is the fact that their defence only looks as good as Spurs. Campbell is the best out of all of them but King and Gardner are on the up while Keown is over the hill. Carr is as good a full back as Ashley Cole if not better. Richards would surely get into Arsenals side before Stepanovs or Cygan. Not much to choose to between them there. (ACTUALLY THERE ARE ABOUT 20 TO CHOOSE FROM THERE AS NOTED ABOVE).

The main difference between Arsenal and Spurs now is Wenger. Wenger has been a clever, astute manager whereas Hoddle just thinks he’s clever and astute (THAT SEEMS ACCURATE).

But look again. Hoddle’s man management skills are awful. He’s a past master at alienating players. Wenger may be better at managing and motivating players than Hoddle, but his blinkered attitude to home grown players and his persistence in buying not-bad-but-not-good players like Cygan, Stepanovs, Lauren, Toure, Gilberto, Edu and van Bronckhurst has been very damaging to Arsenal’s future (HOW SO? WHAT SUPERSTAR YOUNGSTER HAVE WE LOST? WRIGHT? RICKETTS? MAYBE UPSON, BUT THE JURY IS STILL OUT ON HIM).

You have to doubt these players’ commitment to the cause if things turn a bit pooh coloured this year (WHY? I DIDN?T DOUBT THEIR COMMITMENT IN 2001-02 WHEN WE COUNTED ON SOME OF THEM IN OUR DOUBLE SEASON).

The Arsenal board is divided about moving to the new stadium. If they don’t move they’re stuck in a museum piece, 1930’s art deco stadium with too few fans to provide enough income to maintain the club. If they move it’ll cost them more money than they can afford to borrow or generate. That’s a lose-lose situation if I ever saw one. (WE?RE IN A STICKY SITUATION ADMITTEDLY, BUT I DON?T THINK WE?VE SEEN THE LAST TWIST IN THIS ONE).

They could ease their financial problems by selling their best players, but that will see the long term decline of the club because they have too little home-grown talent to replace them, which is Wenger’s fault of course. (WHAT ARE YOU BASING THIS ON? WHERE WAS IT WRITTEN THAT WENGER HAD TO USE ALL THE YOUTH TEAMERS LAST YEAR? OR THAT BRINGING IN PLAYERS LIKE GARRY, HOYTE, SVARD, VOLTZ OR BENTLEY THIS YEAR WOULD BE TOO LATE?)

If they want to sell players to get decent money they have to sell Vieira now otherwise he’ll go on a Bosman next summer. He clearly already suspects the tits are going only one way and that’s upwards (REALLY, ACCORDING TO WHO, THE MEDIA? HIS AGENT?). But a season without Vieira’s presence in midfield will ruin Arsenal.

If they sell Henry they can kiss goodbye to any silverware at all (WHEN HAS SELLING HENRY EVER BEEN EVEN REMOTELY HINTED AT?). But he and Vieira are their only big money assets (IT?S A NEGATIVE NOT TO HAVE BIG SUMS OF MONEY TIED UP IN INDIVIDUAL PLAYERS?). If Henry gets injured or poached by Chelsea, their days as second best in the Premiership are over and their days as North London’s top club could well be in jeopardy too. I can see Arsenal fighting it out for sixth this year with Spurs….it might seem incredible I know, but I reckon it’s that bad. (AND YOU?RE AN EXPERT BECAUSE…? TAKE A LOOK AT WHAT THE BOOKIES ARE SAYING. THESE GUYS LIVE AND DIE BY CORRECTLY PREDICTING WHO WILL WIN THE PREMIERSHIP. UNLIKE MEDIA WHO CAN SAY WHATEVER THEY WANT, NO MATTER HOW ASININE, BOOKIES HAVE TO BE RIGHT. THEY RATE ARSEANAL JUST BEHIND MAN UNITED TO WIN THE EPL.)